March - a pause

Calm before the storm, anxiety before the show.

Since last September, I was given one of the best news, that by end of March I will be traveling for two weeks to Japan. Not only my first time traveling to Japan, but also my first time traveling internationally. I always felt some weird embarrassment with the fact I’ve never had the opportunity to travel more, no stories of studying abroad, and no stories of being a little more worldly. A personal insecurity. But with such an adventure comes the preparation also this expectation that this is my “dream” vacation and that it must be perfect and for it to be perfect, I mentally have to put a pause to a lot of personal and career goals. I also have discussed before about being burnt out and having a lack of inspiration, so I am hoping this two week getaway will serve as a solution to all these feelings I’ve had since finding out I was going in the first place. Although during this period I’ve been writing and creating art for my next project, I’ve felt like I couldn’t 100% commit myself because I’m thinking of something else on the horizon, I’ve put dating on the back burner because I’m so terrified of falling and the chance of being disappointed soil my dream trip. So even though I’m in this “calm” state, I can’t help but feeling the anxiety build up, it’s part excitement and part nervousness to face what will I feel after I come back home with no more excuses. As I pack my suitcase, I’ll say my final piece, I will allow myself to take this experience with no expectations and I hope to come back stronger than ever.

- grace crnojević

My debut book, Intimates, (click here to purchase), is now officially out.